10 Spanish things better than their UK equivalents (Part II)

Onwards and upwards then with numbers six to ten, and, first off an apology because the next one doesn't actually exist in the UK so it isn't really a direct comparison. Having said that it's a great idea that might catch on in Britain.

Time for a nap

|La Siesta - the word itself puts me in mind of one of those spaghetti westerns starring the late Lee van Cleef, where, in a remote New Mexico town, the dusty and fly blown streets are deserted as folk escape the heat of the early afternoon sun. The streets of Spain aren't fly blown or dusty, but between say, one pm and five in the afternoon quite a lot less people are around as stores close and everyone takes a bit of a breather. Depending on who you ask, the Spanish siesta is the period immediately following a big meal; so whether you eat at two or four o'clock it's irrelevant, your siesta starts then. Picture yourself falling asleep in an armchair after a massive Sunday dinner and you're getting there. Alternatively, there are the proponents of the "too hot to work" theory which has considerable mileage when the August temperature is nudging forty degrees. The argument is slightly less convincing in January though when the mercury barely reaches fourteen. Whatever, the siesta is great - except when the chemist is closed and I've got a splitting headache.

The North Sea scares kids shitless


Beaches - on the face of it, British and Spanish beaches have quite a bit in common - water, sand and a promenade - for example. Check again though in August and the difference will be plain to see, as will the approximately three million people wedged onto the sands the shimmering Mediterranean gently licks. By contrast, the industrial looking North Sea, grey and icy, hammers ashore and savagely drags half the shingle banks with it as it retreats. While all this happens UK holiday makers hunker down behind wind-breaks, without which, their day at the seaside takes on the air of something decidedly miserable. If that isn't enough to rest my case, what about the chiringuitoes, attractive beach bars that serve you hot food and cold drinks? Trust me, they really are a fabulous idea. It's not all good news though, the quintessentially English beach hut - very popular amongst the Brits for keeping out of the chilly wind - doesn't exist in my world, which is often plagued in high summer by swarms of jellyfish. Thousands and thousands of these spiteful little sods, some of which are quite dangerous too, make August something of an ordeal for many. I've not heard a single report of any Great White sharks perusing the lunch menu from the just offshore beyond the shallows though.

Bank holidays - another real goodie, and, unlike Gran Bretaña, Good Friday, Christmas and Boxing days aside, Spain doesn't restrict her bank holidays to a Monday. There are also two different types so double bubble!!

Sheffield Wednesday - the first non-Monday UK bank holiday

 As a nation Spain has seventeen autonomous regions and two autonomous cities, each of which has their own group of local holidays unique to the province. My patch, Valencia, celebrates the day of the Community on October the 9th for example and other towns throughout the province have public holidays of their own that neighbouring councils don't. Add to these then the National holidays that everyone enjoys, ie., December the 6th, (Constitution Day), and January the 6th, (Three Kings Day/Twelfth Night) amongst others, you soon rack up a mighty impressive collection of days off, quite a few more than the United Kingdom. It's also quite important to note that these "fiestas" are governed by date, and so, fall on whatever day is necessary. This is another good thing because if your public holiday falls on say, a Tuesday or Thursday, in certain circumstances, people help themselves to the Monday or Friday as well. It's called  "la puente" (the bridge). The Spanish - you gotta love 'em..........

Some random Spanish folk!!!

 People...........which leads me neatly on to my next theme. Nearly as contentious with the Brits as my inclusion of Spanish ladies this one, but, unlike the aforementioned it isn't included because Spanish people are more aesthetically pleasing. Perhaps it's something to do with the combination of wanting to improve my meagre Spanish at every opportunity, but, and I might be hopelessly wrong here, the majority of the indigenous folk in my world seem unfailingly polite. Maybe they just take pity on me and smile nicely to be polite, I'm not sure. What I do know is that those who figure out I'm not one of them immediately reply in English because they too want to practise their studies, and, all of a sudden, cha ching the ice is broken!! There are exceptions to the rule though and, oddly enough, they invariably involve old folk, who, wherever they live are simply cantankerous. Imagine living in Germany! Overall, the Spanish in general really are to be applauded handsomely for the way in which they tolerate so many incomers, most of whom set up home in or around popular resort towns where the locals understand their financial value to the community. Those that don't, me, have their own slightly harder linguistic and cultural adventure which, trust me, is no less rewarding.

If Carslberg did countries

Lifestyle - there you go then, given what's gone before my personal number ten should be obvious, no? Okey dokey, for the educationally challenged who probably won't ever figure it out, the final item on my list is a combination of the previous nine, which, collectively provide me with a quality of life I could only have imagined as recently as 2005. Prior to that date I had no idea how well fed, stupidly cheaply I could be whilst admiring very agreeable ladies from beneath a hot sun on a sun drenched sandy beach whilst supping a cafe granizado that cost me fifty centimos. But there's more, granted I personally earn a fraction of my English take home. (which was necessary to pay the mortgage, prohibitive car running costs, Council Tax, artist formerly known as Mrs Rendall and sundry other add-ons), but I can't ever remember being happier. Honestly! A happiness sadly missing, for the most part, from my previous UK life is easily attainable in Spain and for a fraction of the cost. Obviously don't take Spanish pensioners for granted, they'll eat you alive as will most elderly folk who think your very existence is down to them, but try and imagine your very happy two August weeks in Greece or the Caribbean all year round.................